It’s Time for LGBTQ Allies in Trenton to Walk the Walk, My Kid’s Life is at Stake
By Denise Rachel
Ask yourself: what lengths would you go to help your own beloved child? How would you respond if your kid needed critical care that could be taken away by a political whim?
When my child was 14, she left a note on the table for me to find the next morning. It read, in part:
“Mommy, I have always felt like a girl trapped in a boy’s body. I am transgender. When you wake up and find this, please do not kick me out of the house.”
Thus began our long journey into this new reality of activism, a journey I never imagined for that blessed baby I brought home 14 years ago.
Despite what you may have read on social media, no parent (or teacher, for that matter) pushes their child to be transgender or nonbinary. No one wants their kid’s life to be harder than it has to be. No parent envisions a future for their kid that’s filled with discriminaton and meanspiritedness. Think about that for a minute. Accepting parents of transgender kids love and empower their children.
We are striving to provide them with a loving and supportive childhood in a world that often hates them.
In the wake of the death of Nex Benedict, a nonbinary child who was relentlessly bullied and died after an altercation in an Oklahoma bathroom, I feel myself on a precipice. Politely, I have waited for decent people to call out transphobia. Patiently, I have waited for society to recognize my child’s humanity. Respectfully, I have waited for politicians and advocacy groups to step up and demand that the transgender and nonbinary community be given the rights and protections they should not even need to beg for.
Today, I am here to say that I will no longer allow myself to dangle from the precipice without a safety net. I am no longer willing to be polite, patient, nor respectful. Enough is enough. No more words. I need to see action. Specifically, New Jersey needs to codify Gender-Affirming Care now.
With other states across the country dehumanizing transgender people through legislation on a daily basis, we see what can happen if complacency is allowed to fester. New Jersey has the opportunity to become a model for civil rights, decency, and the right of parents to raise their children in accordance with their needs.
Gender-affirming care is essential to the lives of transgender people. Forget the bogus statistics and mean-spirited claims extremists post for clicks on social media to make money. I have seen its effects first-hand. It saved my daughter’s life. No amount of claims it has done harm by unknowing strangers will ever convince me otherwise because I have seen it happen with my own beautiful child.
Gratefully, some allies have stepped forward in our state government. Senator Theresa Ruiz is always an advocate to the LGBTQ + community. And, from personal experience, Senator Andrew Zwicker is exemplary. He has listened intently to my fears, been a voice of hope when I’m overwhelmed , and stepped up to meet any challenge the community has asked of him. I will be forever thankful.
However, we need more politicians standing up for what is right. We need a solid gender- affirming bill. We need sponsors and cosponsors now and for the legislation to NOT languish in committee like good bills often do in Trenton.
And, we need professional advocacy orgs to step up or get out of the way.
As a mom, I implore all parties to take a seat at the table.
The time for gender affirming care is now, not during lame duck or after the primary. The time is now.
Lastly, for anyone reading this who may not be swayed by my words, remember, I was once unaware that I had a transgender child until the day that I was. Ask yourself: what lengths would you go to help your own beloved child? How would you respond if your kid needed critical care that could be taken away by a political whim?
Please codify gender-affirming care now!
Denise Rachel is an advocate for transgender equality based in Monmouth County.
I agree. Time to get this done!
Lives are only at stake because delusions are affirmed instead of treated properly with therapy. Studies have routinely shown that non-intervention is the best course of action, and that most gender dysphoric children end up growing out of it. It’s been long understood that children cannot make life altering decisions for themselves. Get a grip and be a good mother.
I feel for your child. It’s a shame what you plan on doing to your poor child.
Every medical and psychological peer review study, report, analysis and statistics show that the frontal lobe of the human brain–the reasoning and decision-making part of the brain–is not fully developed until age 25. Inculcating and forcing upon children under 25 with perverted transgender and LGBTQ propaganda, is outright emotional, physical, psychological and sexual child abuse. Any parent, teacher, professional, etc. who compels, forces, coerces, manipulates children into this evil lifestyle should be charged, tried, convicted and sentenced to long prison terms. Teachers and education administrators should be immediately fired, charged with child abuse and child sexual abuse, put on the State’s Child Abuse Registries and never be allowed to be around children again. If they have their own children, the State should move to take their children from them, because these parents are not parenting. These parents have serious mental disorders if they are allowing their children (under 25 years of age) to be subjected and manipulated by this perverted sexual poison.
List of medical institutions and studies:
From Univ. of Rochester Med. Ctr.–Brain isn’t fully developed until 25: https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx?ContentTypeID=1&ContentID=3051#:~:text=The%20rational%20part%20of%20a,cortex%2C%20the%20brain's%20rational%20part.
https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=141164708
From the NIH: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2892678/
From the Law Society of Scotland: https://www.lawscot.org.uk/news-and-events/legal-news/brain-not-fully-developed-until-age-25-research-reveals/
https://mentalhealthdaily.com/2015/02/18/at-what-age-is-the-brain-fully-developed/
From the American Psychological Association (“APA”): https://www.apa.org/monitor/julaug04/brain
More about transgender influencers that interact with children can be found at these links:
https://www.the11thhourblog.com/post/cutting-to-the-chase-youtube-s-bearded-and-breastless-transmen-a-salesforce-in-the-making-1
https://www.the11thhourblog.com/post/cutting-to-the-chase-youtube-s-bearded-and-breastless-transmen-a-salesforce-in-the-making-2
https://www.the11thhourblog.com/post/cutting-to-the-chase-youtube-s-bearded-and-breastless-transmen-a-salesforce-in-the-making-3
INSIDE THE TRANSGENDER EMPIRE:
Transgenderism is Marxism and Communism. The movement was hatched by the fringes of academia. It is a social construct being used to ruthlessly DECONSTRUCT the white, male, heterosexual power structure, e.g., destruction of the Christian History of man and woman and then children= nuclear family.
The transgender movement, being financed with obscene amounts of money by wealthy elitists and the government, believe that by creating women out of men and men out of women, the natural structure of Creation can be toppled.
It’s actually called Transgender Rage to disrupt and refigure transgender power as a spiritual resource for social and environmental transformation. In essence, it is akin to the Frankenstein Monster. Transgenders believe they are monsters because they hate who they are and are trying to transfigure themselves. The “transsexual body” is a “technological construction” that represents a war against Western Society and the natural heterosexual order. It is against “traditional and normal family values” and against the “hegemonic oppression” of nature itself. This is what these seriously mentally disturbed, delusional and violent transgenders and transsexuals believe.
Obviously, the transgender movement is inherently political. Its reconstruction of personal identity is meant to advance a COLLECTIVE political reconstruction or transformation (as former President Barack Insane Obama used to say that he was “transforming” society). Some of the trans activists view their movement as the future of MARXISM.
In a collection of essays entitled “Transgender Marxism”, trans activist writer Rosa Lee argues that trans people can serve as the new vanguard of the proletariat, promising to abolish Western heteronormativity in the same way that orthodox Marxism promised to abolish capitalism.
Lee writes, “Today, in a time of both rising fascism and an emergent socialist movement, our challenge is transsexualizing our Marxism. We should thin of the project of transition to communism in out time–communisation–as including the transition to new communist selves, new ways of being and relating to one another”.
This is the great project of the transgender movement: to abolish the distinctions of man and woman, to transcend the limitations imposed by God and nature, and to connect the personal struggle of trans individuals to the political struggle to transform society in a radical way (into socialism and then communism).
So, there you have it. The transgender community espouses transforming America and the West into a socialist and communist society, while transforming themselves. This is the beginnings of transhumanism where technology is being used to enhance the physical body and the mind that will be either controlled by outside sources such as corporations and/or governments. This is the beginnings of an extremely dangerous idea to have humans evolve into superbeings (or something else evil), controlled by outside sources.
We real Americans need to keep a vigil on these people to prevent them from taking control of the schools, corporate world and political world. Based on statistical population information, transgenders only account for .02 percent of the population, or about 50,000 total in the United States. How is it that the have such a large voice and deep pockets???? Because of wealthy Marxist elitists in the corporate world and academia, as well as because of Democrat-Socialists currently in charge of our government (Biden-Obama Administration).
Read: IMPRIMIS, Sept. 2023, Vol. 52, No. 9 (IMPRIMIS is a publication of Hillsdale College with over 6,400,000 readers)
“INSIDE THE TRANSGENDER EMPIRE”, Christopher F. Rufo, Author, America’s Cultural Revolution
The frontal lobe of human brains isn’t fully developed until 25 years of age. That’s the part of the brain for decision-making and reasoning. This has been studied ad nauseum by neurosurgeons, neurologists, psychiatrists, medical doctors, etc. for decades. How can a kindergartner or even a high school student be able to make a decision or reason what they want, becoming LGBTQ, when they aren’t even 25 years of age. Forcing these sexual perversions on children, or CRT on children, IS emotional, psychological and physical child abuse.
These scientific studies, perodicals, etc. on a child’s rational and decision-making part of the brain not being fully developed until 25 yrs. old are from experts and is being presented from both sides of the political spectrum–
From Univ. of Rochester Med. Ctr.–Brain isn’t fully developed until 25: https://www.urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/content.aspx?ContentTypeID=1&ContentID=3051#:~:text=The%20rational%20part%20of%20a,cortex%2C%20the%20brain's%20rational%20part.
https://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=141164708
From the NIH: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2892678/
From the Law Society of Scotland: https://www.lawscot.org.uk/news-and-events/legal-news/brain-not-fully-developed-until-age-25-research-reveals/
https://mentalhealthdaily.com/2015/02/18/at-what-age-is-the-brain-fully-developed/
From the American Psychological Association (“APA”): https://www.apa.org/monitor/julaug04/brain
It’s shocking to see how many people misinterpret studies on brain development in relation to gender. I would ask them when they CHOSE to be heterosexual. According to the APA, after years of study, transgender is not considered a mental illness, just a heterosexuality is not an illness. The transgender community has been around for hundreds, if not thousands of years. Why the sudden hatred? Just because one may not understand others, doesn’t mean there should be hate, or paranoia. You don’t have to understand to accept. Stop the paranoia and take a moment to educate yourself.
To “Lisa Garwood”: I did educate myself and continue to educate myself on the subject of LGBTQ and Transgender agendas. What I have found is what I stated above, plus significantly more information than I can present here. Before you wail about people who oppose the LGBTQ and Transgender propaganda and agendas, doesn’t give you a right to call them hateful or paranoia. A recent peer-reviewed study shows empirical evidence that the Left Wing Authoritarians (LWA) such as yourself evidence dark personality traits as well as prosocial variables (altruism and social justice commitment), with the dark ego-focused trait of severe psychopathic narcissism. When .02 percent of the entire U.S. population (about 50,000) are transgender, what gives them the right to dictate, foist, threaten, coerce, harass, inculcate, etc. their agendas on the rest of us??? What gives you the right to influence my children or grandchildren into the LGBTQ and Transgender lifestyle when they aren’t even adults or 25 years of age????? What you are proposing is nothing less child abuse and child sexual abuse.
We are with you Denise. Consider everyone in my family to be an ally. Just ignore the troll who uses Thomas Jefferson’s name in vain. Sometimes I think some doth protest too much!
What agenda are you talking about? The only thing I have ever seen the LGBTQ community ask for is something the real Thomas Jefferson advocated for: “Equality” and “Liberty and justice for all.” No one is trying to change your children or grandchildren. Please read this essay carefully. The author of this heartfelt letter is simply saying she wants her child to be safe and free from harm. Surely you must have empathy for another parent ? And just a note: none of us know the current age of her child, since the only age that is mentioned is when she came out. Consider the possibility that she is an adult and her frontal lobe is fully developed. Please try to be more caring. We are all humans; all created equal!
As a clergy person, I am in total support of gender affirming legislation. I have seen first hand how “biblical” and “scientific” details are misconstrued and do great harm. We are all of us wonderfully and beautifully made
— and even remade!
Well said! I cannot for the life of me understand how and why so many people lack compassion these days. What happened to the notion of treating others as you would wish to be treated?
There is no lack of compassion. The Leftist trolls here that attack me for bringing out cogent, scientifically and psychologically provable evidence that transgender and gender-affirming legislation is child abuse, are the ones who lack compassion. Louise says she doesn’t know the current age of the child. I guess she doesn’t know what reading comprehension is. The “letter” article says the child is 14, to wit: “Thus began our long journey into this new reality of activism, a journey I never imagined for that blessed baby I brought home 14 years ago.”
The author of the “letter” says she wants her child to be safe and free from harm. Nonsense. She is going to allow her child to be medically drugged with hormones that will cause her physical pain, then cut up, and changed. Changed into what, I don’t know. At some point in the future, her child may come back and hate her mother for allowing her to change to what is biologically impossible.
The LGBTQ community has for years come out and said to parents that “we’re coming for your children” and will turn them gay. They’re saying “we’re coming for your children”, which is predatory, followed up with, “it’s our turn to indoctrinate the children” only confirms their child sexual abuse and pedophilia. That’s NOT “equality” and “Liberty and justice for all”.
I guess you’re one of those Leftist-Communist narcissists who want to “save democracy” too, from the 100 MILLION, or so, of us conservative and Republican voters who believe in the family and our own children. Can you even define what a democracy is? Didn’t you ever hear of the People’s DEMOCRATIC Republic of North Korea? Or, the People’s DEMOCRATIC Republic of East Germany (before 1991)???? Look up to see what they did to their own people under the moniker of “democracy”.
The clergy person who supports gender-affirming legislation has no room to talk, especially with the Church’s history of molesting children. It makes me wonder why he is so “hell” bent on gender-affirming legislation.
Okay. I am going to jump in to clarify a view points in light of Tom’s comments. First, thank you for clarifying for those who are of sound minds and warm hearts, the extreme hatred and misunderstanding this community faces. I have heard some really elaborate conspiracy theories in my life, but this one really had me scratching my head trying to make sense of all the nonsequetors. Who knew the trans community was capable of such advanced plotting? Given that they’ve been cited in early Judaic writings, clearly, they’ve had a lot of time to get this takeover right.
Secondly, Tommy, just to calm your fears about my child’s wellbeing, although she came out at 14, no hormones were started until the age of 20 and no surgeries were had. Although, I would not fault any person or parent in following an adjacent path based on their or their kid’s needs.
Lastly, thank you to all the kind individuals who took the time to express their support. You give me hope that one day, op-eds like these will no longer be needed and everyone will worry about their own, short, beautiful lives in this planet and not waste time passing judgement on others. All the best ❤️
To “Thomas Jefferson” (sure, let’s pretend),
Your use of the terms “propaganda”, “agenda”, “left wing authoritarians”, and so many others in your rant, dig your own grave. No one is attempting to “dictate, foist, threaten, coerce, harass, inculcate, etc.” their mythical “agenda” on you. They simply have the right for you not to dictate, foist, threaten, coerce, harass, inculcate, etc. your beliefs on them. You have the right to believe what you want, you have zero right to force your beliefs on others.
Thank you for your willingness to share your family’s experiences. You have shared what many endure privately. You are a wonderful advocate for your child. Gender affirming care is life affirming and life saving. Those are the most important facts. Ignore the hate.
For those readers interested in scientific facts I will offer them here as I am a licensed healthcare provider. (It’s a much better use of my time then addressing nonsensical disinformation)
The frontal lobe is responsible for executive functioning and decision making and does mature until around 25 years of age. As a result, adolescents are at risk for impulsive actions such as substance use and driving while intoxicated; this does not impact on long term self knowledge. Gender and sexual orientation have little to do with decision making and more to dow with self knowledge which the prefrontal cortex dow not affect, just like we know if we are right or left handed from the time we are young. If we use 25 as a magic age, than no HS or college baseball player should be drafted to a major league team, and no one under 25 should marry or be hired after college for a career commitment, and so on. Do you see why this line of reasoning is extremely flawed; quite illogical!
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3445337/
The part of the brain that is involved with the development of gender identity is the central subdivision of the bed nucleus of the stria terminalis and the third interstital nucleus of the anterior hypothalamus. Not expecting everyone to identify, this portion of the brain, but just pointing out it has nothing to do with the prefrontal cortex
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/32204531/
And for real medical association opinions, (as opposed to blogs and/or religious based associations) please note that the American Association of Pediatrics, American Medical Association, Endocrinologist’s Society, American Psychiatric Association and many others, all support gender affirming care for transgender/nonbinary youth and adults because that’s what science says is best.
https://www.aap.org/en/news-room/news-releases/aap/2018/aap-policy-statement-urges-support-and-care-of-transgender-and-gender-diverse-children-and-adolescents/
https://www.ama-assn.org/press-center/press-releases/ama-reinforces-opposition-restrictions-transgender-medical-care
https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/fullarticle/2805345
https://www.endocrine.org/advocacy/position-statements/transgender-health
https://www.psychiatry.org/File%20Library/About-APA/Organization-Documents-Policies/Policies/Position-2018-Access-to-Care-for-Transgender-and-Gender-Diverse-Individuals.pdf#:~:text=Therefore%2C%20the%20American%20Psychiatric%20Association%3A%20Recognizes%20that%20appropriately,private%20health%20insurance%20coverage%20for%20gender%20transition%20treatment.
So based on scientific data,, I join with Denise in asking the NJ Legislature to pass bills to protect children and adults so that they may live a healthy, productive life in the gender they identify with. In addition, rather than vitriol and hatred, I would also ask all people to please bring love, kindness , empathy and nonjudgemental support to this world as that is what my grandchildren, and all generations to come, deserve.
I just have to note how amusing it is that the guy who calls himself “Thomas Jefferson” has to put scare wuotes around the name of the person who seems to be using her own name (hi Lisa!)
Clearly “TJ” spends a little too much time on Truth Social –
Time to get this done NJ! Time to step up your have LGBTQ allies!
Thank you for sharing your personal family experience. What has happened to compassion and treating others like you want to be treated. Some of these comments are totally unnecessary and shows why we need to pass a law to protect the trans community You are a wonderful advocate for your child and stay strong !!
As the extremely proud parent of a transgender adult I completely agree! I am also on the board of a PFLAG Chapter and am so disgusted in the disinformation surrounding these beautiful humans. They have more heart and bravery than any of these trolls posting lies. We will never stop fighting for the rights of people to be themselves and live their authentic lives!!
I agree. Thank you.
Thank you Denice! As the proud parent of a transgender adult, we need to protect access to the healthcare that is needed and has been approved by every legitimate medical organization. I am also on the board of a PFLAG Chapter and am deeply concerned about the disinformation that is spreading. These brave beautiful humans need our love and support and have every right to live their lives in peace. The LGBTQ community is braver and more authentic than these weak trolls will ever be. Thank you!!
Wonderful essay. Don’t give up!
Amazing how the brainwashed Leftists just don’t get it. They name-call me and others who try and show the stupidity that they are doing to their own children, because they want to give their children anything they want. And, that my dears, is the problem with today’s society. You moronic women don’t know how to say “NO”!!!! to your own kids. You are committing monstrous acts against your own children, but can’t see the forest for the trees. Someday in the future, your kids are going to come back and say they hate you for letting them change.
To show how ridiculous the whole trans agenda and LGBTQ agenda that goes along with it is, the U.K. just prohibited ALL puberty blockers for minors. Sweden, Norway and Finland has done the same, or at least limited puberty blockers for minors drastically. Only a matter of time before the U.S. follows suit.
And, for Denise Rachel, you’re the one committing child abuse. You gave your daughter hormones at 20, when all the scientific, medical and psychological peer reviewed studies, articles, statistics, analyses say that the brain is not fully developed until 25 years of age (in some cases, it may be older than that). But, hell, what do I know??? I only have a legal background and psychological background. I don’t know what I’m talking about.
As I understand it, gender-affirming care includes a wide range of services, including social, psychological, behavioral, and medical interventions. Opponents brandish stories of hormone therapies and surgery, when those things come much later in the process, if at all. These children need care and understanding, and they very much need to feel safe. We need to give them that. Denise, your family loves you and we are behind you 100%
Gender-affirming care are the new Communist buzz words to allow parents, teachers, school administrators, healthcare “professionals”, and pedophiles to abuse their children.
Wow the amount of antiquated links and data that 🤔is it a former president from the 1800’s who is quoting and obsessing on trans people obviously that borders on OCD his own issues. This is very simple . This is between a parent , healthcare providers and there child. Some empathy and compassion would help. We’re not railing about the OCD Monticello guy and his choices for mental health so leave the decision to the parent. Denise we have your back on this and hopefully Thomas gets the help he needs 🙏
Denise, thank you for your essay. You nailed it when you said “why would any parent want their child’s life to be more difficult?”. My son is trans and transitioned in his mid-20’s. When he was younger, we thought he might be trans and gave him the space to follow his path. When he first told me he was trans, i shared this info with family and friends, who wanted education so they could be supportive. I told my friends in the LGBTQ communities who said, “that’s great”. What my friends in the LGBTQ community knew – and what i came to see – is that my son is now happier and more confident then i have ever seen in his lifetime. Everyone should be able to witness such growth in a person. Every trans kid needs a parent like Denise.
Petra, or should I say “Karen”, I’m sorry if my updated arguments offend thee. Why do we need legislation being rammed down everyone’s throats by .02% of the population. I find that reprehensible that 99.98% of the population has to bow down to idiotic, self-centered, selfish parents, while the rest of us parents have to tip-toe around and not offend anyone with comments or looks. I thought the First Amendment was still in play. I guess the “useful idiots” hiding in the closet as parents making comments to support a failed indoctrination need to re-think their selfish positions. I guess it’s O.K. for the parents in this commentary section to be able to abuse, change, mutilate, and assault their own children. Why? Because the children can’t fight back and haven’t had time to reason out what they’re doing. A lot of transgender kids, who’ve become adults, are now rueing the day they made the changes, and warn everyone else thinking about it, not to do it because it doesn’t help them with their mental problems.
Our third President did not consider Trans agendas as constitutional, or even lawful. In fact, our Forefathers would have taken children away from parents that I see here, for what can only be termed child abuse.
I’m being accused of antiquated thinking, while the rest of the world is waking up to this monstrous abomination and putting on the brakes. One day, in the near future, society is going to wake up to this Frankensteinian attempt to change and mutilate children, and say “what the hell were we thinking?”
It is heartwarming to see the supportive comments coming out here. So many people are quietly caring and compassionate. Thank you, Denise for the courage to come forward with your story and appeal for the prevention of pain and suffering for today’s youth that in past decades has tormented people who were shamed, beaten, punished, rejected and banished from their family and community. To what purpose? Ignorance and fear are toxic and crippling to both the targeted non-conforming human as well those who perpetrate those action. The result is at least 4x the suicide rate – perhaps the goal of the hate-mongers?
Yes, transgender are a very small % of the population. How does providing sensitive, appropriate care impinge on any one else?? Targeting trans people specifically to deny appropriate psychosocial and medical treatment IS a violation of human rights. While small in number, there are”closeted” and open transpeople in all walks of life. I personally know transpeople who or have been attorneys, computer programmers, aviation service manager, American Legion Commander and Chaplain, civil engineers, casino manager, automotive mechanic, parts manager and detailer,university professors, Navy seal, fundraiser, business owner, etc. etc. etc. All upstanding community members, taxpayers and devoted to the family that has not rejected them.
A caring parent, who wants a healthy, fulfilled and successful child, will listen, support and provide guidance to their child. That is what you are doing Denise. And more and more parents are learning for your example. THANK YOU for fighting against a narrow, targeted injustice designed to appease those few who are subject to fear-mongering, disinformation and conspiracy theories.
They have no
Taxpayers shouldn’t be funding “appropriate psychosocial and medical treatment. It’s an individual prerogative that should be paid strictly by the individual or their family. Also, there should be no laws proposed to make them a “victim” class, as they are not victims. The majority of the population should not bow down to such a small % of the population, lest we turn this nation into a nation of “victim” groups with government protection. This is known as TYRANNY by the minorities!!!!!